Some people send out wedding lists, some ask for cash - but what should you get for those you care about?

Well, the last wedding I went to, we gave them cash. Why? Because they were already living together, and had everything “housey” that they needed - no toasters or curtains or coasters required!

It is a bit impersonal, but I made it special by getting a £50 note (a new and unused on, and they look pretty cool), popping it in a gift box, and asking them to let me know what they spent it on.

Couple of weeks after the wedding, just befpre they go on honeymoon, they send me a nice card, telling me they used it to finish off paying for their honeymoon - 2 weeks in Canada. Lovely.

So, my gift, combined with other friends and familys gifts of money, combined to give the happy couple a financially good start - they didn’t have to take a loan for the honeymoon, it got paid in full before they went.

It’s what wedding gifts were originally all about - getting the young couple the things they need to get on their feet.
They have the house etc, so helping them keep out of debt is surely the modern gift?

Your wedding shoes and wedding dress above everything should complement each other. This doesn’t mean to say that you have to have them matching exactly. Most dresses will come in neutral shades of white, ivory or cream, though you do get more vibrant shades, bold colours or metallic colours and can become their own individual feature of your wedding attire. No matter what you do you’re ready for some major shoe shopping once you know the style, colour and fabric. To be ideal you will have a swatch from your wedding dress ready for when you do shoe shopping in order to have the colours perfectly matched. You could also have shoes bought especially that are ready to be professionally dyed. If you are to have your dress made and fitted by a dressmaker it is very important that you take along your shoes, this way your dress will be made to fit your shoes, and the hemline will be the correct length. It’s best to pair up simple shoes with an extravagant dress and vice versa. Take into consideration the length of your dress the shorter the dress the more of your shoes will be on display and things like ankle straps may look good but then can also make your legs look shorter.

At the Reception, your reception will most likely begin with the receiving line, this is a great opportunity to take the time to say a few words of thanks to all your guests and it will give you time to relax as you are wished well by all you happy, smiling guests and family. Many people say that they forget they find it hard to remember their wedding day it goes so fast, an idea for you to remember it is to ask someone to set an alarm to go off every hour to help remind you to take a good look around and take in your surroundings. Also it’s a special day that is shared, so talk about what your partner has seen, heard and felt throughout the day it will bring it all back. Another way to help you remember things, is to relax enjoy yourself and laugh, the laughs are always memorable, even incidents quips and near disasters will be remembered for the laughs. Don’t drink too much either; drinks can dull the mind so for a lasting memory of the big day remember to at least pace yourself, with the drinks. Toasts can become a great excuse for drinking champagne, but don’t sip it drink it.

At the Ceremony, the big moment is finally here, rehearsals are long gone and you’re the star of the show, and now it’s time for that Oscar winning performance. Take your time to make your entrance; every bride will have nerves taking that long walk that seems like a lifetime towards her handsome husband to be, a deep breath may sound cliché but it works, and it allows your guests time to admire you as well as giving you chance to compose yourself. Look around you, let that smile radiate out to everyone. Something that tends to happen or not happen as it were is that when people get to the vows nothing happens, breathing is a key part in preventing this from happening a key stress stopper. You may have seen all those videos of brides passing out at this point and you’re going spare about it happening to you. Well don’t, it rarely happens. Remember to feel supported by your guests and not to feel burdened everyone has come to wish you and your partner the very best. If it all gets emotional don’t be embarrassed to shed a couple of tears, just avoid the Niagara falls, and remember to wear waterproof mascara.

The Wedding Eve is equally as important as the wedding day, this is a great time to make preparations for your big day make a time table of all the things you’ll need to do and follow it. The last thing you’ll be wanting is a hangover in the morning so it’s best to avoid any alcohol in excess though one for medicinal purposes is accepted though, and most importantly make sure you get to bed at a reasonable time.

The Morning of the wedding can be very stressful, so be sure to start the day calmly, slowly allow yourself to take in as much of the events to follow as you can. Take plenty of time to have a great soak in a bath, with a cup of tea, undisturbed. Make sure you eat breakfast, even if you do have a dodgy stomach, that’s doing somersaults, even if it’s just a slice of toast fainting from hunger would be much worth. Take a few moments before the motions begin and just have a think about what lies ahead. Try to keep your distance during your preparation of the day from anyone whom you may find stressful, to keep them out of your hair try giving them minor jobs that will make them feel important.

Try not to over think things. Try not to rethink things over and over, once you’ve made a decision. This is believed to lead to bridal craziness, wondering whether they’ve made the right choice and it will all work out and go to plan worry about anything going wrong, as hard as it may be to make the decision, once it’s done it’s done tick it off the list and move on. The best kind of schedule is the one thing at a time schedule, don’t multi task, give yourself at least 15 minutes to tackle each item on your wedding list, and then tackle each one individually. You won’t find yourself overwhelmed if you allow yourself to focus on just one task at a time. A lot of brides often believe that they can do everything and refuse to ask for any help with anything, but the truth of the matter is don’t try to be superwoman there are tones of people who would rush at the chance of helping you. I’ve heard it all before from, it’s cheaper to its more fun doing it myself, but it can become a stressful time and it’s a time you want to look back on with joy and why not let your friends and family in on this fun and enjoyment? After all planning a planning a wedding takes in access of 240 hours altogether.

Don’t forget your socks, it may think like a really idiotic thing to do but they can be forgotten, and this is a mistake far too often seen in photographs. If you have your hair shaven, have it done about a week before and not on the day of the wedding to avoid the bald, shiny look on your big day. As with females, be sure to removed labels from your shoes prior to the wedding, and as a male, from any other clothing too! Traditionally your buttonhole is worn on your left lapel, but whichever side you choose to have it on make sure that you and your ushers are all wearing it on the same side. Most importantly the thing for both you and the bride to do on the day is to let everyone else and everything go, and enjoy your day! It’s time for you to have the time of your life now, the planning is complete. Laugh off any tiny minor little mishaps be prepared to take whatever you can into your stride. Remember this is nothing more than you and your partner becoming husband and wife, it’s not about all the fancy things, it’s about you two.

So your daughters getting married, seems like a lifetime since yours and it’s your responsibility to send her into a married life that will be as successful as yours, in a sentimental, amusing way. Take your time to enjoy this moment you’ve waited all your lifetime for this. Even if you’re not a slushy gushy father, and neither you’re daughter take this chance to tell her how much you care and let the world know how wonderful she truly is.

Now what to say, be sure to thank all your guests for coming and sharing in your daughters special day, it’s also a good idea to mention anyone that has travelled along way to thank them for their efforts. It’s a dead cert that anyone who has provided any sort of financial contribution to the wedding should definitely be on your thank-you list. Let your daughter know how proud you are of her, how much you love her and how much she means to you. This moment is as bigger part of your daughter’s life as her marriage is. Welcome your son-in-law into the family as well as his family let them know you’re happy for them to become a part of it. Reminisce on your daughter’s life pre-wedding, it was still an important time for her and the time that shaped her into the women she now is. Wish the newly-weds all the best of success and happiness in the future. And finally propose a toast to the bride and groom.

So you’re the best man and you have to write a speech because, you’ve known the groom most of his life and have copped the responsibility and regardless of the fact that the groom has known you for the same amount of time he seems to have forgotten you’d be clueless when it comes down to writing a speech. So here’s some advice.

Never swear or use offensive words no matter what. When you’re writing your speech keep in mind your audiences and lil ode Gran in the corner, we don’t want any unexpected heart attacks on the day. Don’t try to hard to be funny it’s not a good look. You can’t go wrong if you don’t say anything that you wouldn’t want anyone to know about, unexpected surprises aren’t great. Most, best men find it helpful to write down their speech in notes for reminders don’t worry about this looking bad it will look better than awkward silences or adlibbing. Make a note of anyone or anything you want to mention or thank. Never make fun of the wedding no matter what may happen. Avoid potentially difficult subjects, the following need no more saying, drug problems, previous partners, womanising, excessive partying, having family or money issues. And the last two most important things, practice, practice, practice! and most importantly enjoy yourself.

Finding the words to use can be difficult, but before you begin, take a few moments to read the Golden Rules of Speechmaking as set out below:

Speeches can be difficult, especially if you find that you and words are not on the best of terms, and you haven’t put pen to paper for a while, but there are some things that if taken into consideration are a dead cert to go down well.

Choose your wording carefully, think about language that will relate your stories to the entire audience, from Great Gran in the corner, who’d me lost at the mention of ‘Facebook’ to the 9 year old Flower girl who’d turn to tugging on mums sleeve wanting to know who ‘John Major’ is. Possibly the most commonly flaunted rule, no swearing or the use of any, let’s say x-rated material. Be natural, it’s no good being remembered as the class clown at high school only to get up there and try to impress with a few words, let’s face it even you don’t understand. Stick to the short and sweet stories, Uncle Joe will fall asleep before the nights out anyway he doesn’t need your help. Get it structured, make sure it’s going somewhere, the best way to go is usually, pre-meeting each other, once together, and now, a big finish is always the way to go. Never laugh at your own jokes, if Lee Evans doesn’t do it it’s a no for you too. Finally, stand up, smile, and don’t put too much pressure a lot of pressure on yourself, you want to look like your enjoying yourself not laying eggs.